A Christmastime Reflection on Phil. 2

At Christmas, we take time to remember how the Alpha and Omega, the great I AM, the Creator of the universe, chose to fit Himself into the pitiful shape of a lowly human.

And we remember that He came as not just any human, but as the most helpless of us all--the infant.

And even more, we remember that he came not only as an infant, but as a babe born to parents from a pathetic town ("Nazareth! Can anything good come from there?" John 1:46), born in a (cold? smelly?) stable, placed to rest in an animal's feeding trough.

And even on top of this, we remember that He lowered Himself to this helpless state out of pure love for mankind. He became the weak to save the weak, even when most didn't and most don't realize that that is what we are. Jesus the Christ as a tiny baby--Praise God for His wisdom and mercy in this plan for salvation!

Even as sinfully corrupted people, we can recognize the unadulterated beauty of a baby. In spite of a baby's being unable to offer anything but itself--that is, a baby has no services or goods to give (and on the contrary, it REQUIRES, even DEMANDS, so many in turn!)--the baby has become a symbol of the gift of life, the "real" meaning of life, and all that is good in the world.

Now take all those warm fuzzies you get when you think of a baby, and somehow conceptualize it as the innocence that Christ maintained even as He grew to be a man, and even as He hung on the cross. A baby cruelly tortured and hung on a cross? That sounds perverse to even mention. But take that feeling of perversity and note that it is really just a tiny fraction of what we SHOULD be feeling when we think of how our sins--our actual, personal, day-to-day sins--are what required that sacrifice to be made.

cherub skin, nothing softer
sweet-smelling head of downy fuzz
joyous smile, nothing purer
cooing as a baby does

What right had we to pierce that supple skin,
to drive the metal shafts, the spear within,
to etch our Very Mercy's head, so meek and mild,
to change compassion's King to sorrow's child?

Praise God for His mercy, indeed. Wishing you a very merry, very humbling Christmastime...

My Election Week Anthem

As Obama prepares to take office, some of us feel the world is about to change for the better; on the other hand, some of us feel that the world is about to end altogether. Whichever camp you may be in, I pray every Christian will sing (with REAL hope):

MY FIRST ALLEGIANCE IS NOT TO A FLAG, A COUNTRY, OR A MAN

MY FIRST ALLEGIANCE IS NOT TO DEMOCRACY OR BLOOD

IT'S TO A KING AND A KINGDOM

America: Not Waving but Drowning

Mail-in ballots are to be mailed out by October 31st. If sleep does not overtake me, I am about to fill out my own ballot. However, before I do so, I feel the need to see in writing some of these many, multicolored thoughts that have been flitting in and out of my mind like so many tiny minnows trying to stay alive just long enough to swim around the pond once or twice.

I've been thinking about politics as a whole. This, I've concluded, is dangerous; it can lead to apathy in times like these. At the moment, my weary brain has two things to say on the topic. The first:

Being so very close to Election Day, just about every television ad is a political one. Every radio ad, every email forward, every Facebook group invitation...I can't seem to catch my breath, there are so many! Since I am a Christian, of course quite a bit of what I read or pay attention to is from the conservative perspective. But: I am continually disappointed in the lemming-like following of Evangelicals behind the McCain/Palin ticket. Since when did the words "evangelical" and "Republican" become synonymous? It's utterly shaming (though I'm no big Obama fan either, mind you). I've read several blogs that share this frustration, and I believe the majority of true believers are in the same, unpleasant boat that I am. (At least, I hope they are...!)

So disgust and frustration among all the political media-madness remain prevelant. Today I hit repeat on the song "O Praise Him" (David Crowder Band)--I must have listened to it twenty times at least--just to push out the clamor and desparately remember that all is for the glory of God alone. I think that merits repeating: All is for the glory of God alone. The song reminded me to

turn [my] ear
to Heaven and hear
the noise inside:
the sound of angels' awe,
the sound of angels' song,
and all this for a King;
We could join and sing,
"All for Christ our King!"

Now how on earth does my eternal citizenship in Heaven translate into a decision regarding which bubble I mark on this one all-too-earthly ballot in 2008? I may as well be asking how God's will is effected on a daily basis; it's essentially the same question, after all, and shall therefore go unanswered at the moment. Many words are meaningless...stand in awe of God... So I ask in place of my question, Psalm 8:4: "What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?"

* * *
I shall move on to a slightly different topic. A broader one. It suddenly occurred to me this evening that this democracy/ republic/ voting thing we've got going in America is a lot like the Old Testament law. SO many people believe that democracy is salvation--vote in the right candidate, and our nation's problems will be fixed; vote to "spread the wealth," and national peace and happiness will result; vote to ban abortions, and the angry, "anti-Democrat" God will be appeased for another four years.

What?

We CANNOT impart life to our nation through laws! Salvation comes from God alone, for His glory alone.

Here is where I mention that I am no Bible scholar, nor do I know how problematic it may be to look at things this way (do please tell me, if you yourself are a scholar, that is), but consider Galatians 3 (or all of Galatians, really...and Romans for that matter):

1You foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you? Before your very eyes Jesus Christ was clearly portrayed as crucified. 2I would like to learn just one thing from you: Did you receive the Spirit by observing the law, or by believing what you heard? 3Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort? 4Have you suffered so much for nothing—if it really was for nothing? 5Does God give you his Spirit and work miracles among you because you observe the law, or because you believe what you heard?

Is that too harsh? Hmm....Well, it wasn't for Paul, that's for sure... The Apostle goes on to say that the law served its purpose by pointing people to the need for Christ:

22But the Scripture declares that the whole world is a prisoner of sin, so that what was promised, being given through faith in Jesus Christ, might be given to those who believe. 23Before this faith came, we were held prisoners by the law, locked up until faith should be revealed. 24So the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ that we might be justified by faith. 25Now that faith has come, we are no longer under the supervision of the law.

So, I suppose, in conclusion, I merely have this to say:

Our political system is imperfect; it WILL fail--if it hasn't already, then it will oh-so-soon, surely. However, like the Old Testament law, that imperfection should serve to point us all to the need for the TRULY perfect. 2 Corinthians 4 is a great passage. Though we cannot hope to suffer nearly as much for the cause of Christ as Paul did, we hold this to be true:

16Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

America doesn't need McCain or Obama. It needs Christ, and--thankfully--He's much too big to fit only in the Oval Office. But He fits in my heart, and in the hearts of my fellow citizens. And in changing hearts, He will be changing what's wrong with America, and the world. DO vote, and vote your conscience. But please see beyond that vote, this election. And cry with all the fervor of a political rally: "Come, Lord Jesus, come!"

Standing in Awe

What a depressing time to live in America. Our country is looking at financially disasterous times second only to the Great Depression era. The two major-party candidates running for President were somehow chosen to do so, yet most people I know do not want either of them in the Oval Office. And we are still at war.


But I am finding comfort in the most depressing yet most uplifting (for me, at least) book of the Bible: Ecclesiastes. As I think on the politics of our day, I am happily reminded in Ecclesiastes chapter 5, verse 7, that "much dreaming and many words are meaningless. Therefore stand in awe of God." This simple imperative encourages me to rise above my growing disgust and to simply, consistently stand in awe of my good, gracious, wrathful, righteous, and--best of all--coming Lord. As Proverbs 19:21 says, "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails."


So if you find yourself depressed about the current political, social, economic, environmental, you-name-it climate, give Ecclesiastes a read. Praise the Lord for his Word, that it is Truth!

Election Season

I am at once exhausted, terrified, excited, and too, too cautious; for I feel as though I am sitting on the cusp of change greater than I've known, and I feel, quite frankly, that it's about time. Is it politics? No. It's Election.

Does the world revolve around me? In my exhaustion, I answer yes, thinking of (what we would call) the practicalities of life--the bills, the meals, the laundry, the soap scum thriving on my shower door--will I ever catch up on the everyday tasks that others seem to check off their lists so easily? Not as long as they are truly "everyday" tasks, methinks. OH, woe is me!

And what in me espouses terror? Quite simply, it is the idea of facing the unholy imperfections which I so feverishly bury, whether I know it or not, more and more deeply under the tissue-paper-thin skin of righteousness that I often feel, whether I know it or not, is better than everyone else's sturdy two-ply. How can God be pleased with me? How can He use me? My physical life, filled to the brim with "practicalities," is too much in the way these days of my spiritual one...

But this is precisely the reason I am also excited. It's that crazy, only-because-God-decides-this-is-what-He-wants-to-do-and-for-no-other-reason fact that this shriveled skin I'm dying in is looked upon by the God of the universe as worthy of saving, worthy of time and effort to nurture, cajole, straight-up slap into change toward a beautiful bride, a holy temple. There are dozens of programs that attempt to teach self-esteem; what resources could be saved by simply explaining the word for which there is no other: grace. Grace is humbling, grace is exciting. I am changing by His grace, and by that alone.

Yet in spite of this, I am cautious too. Oh, how caution smacks of doubt!--doubt that God is who He says He is, doubt that perfection is demanded of me, doubt that I can be so much more than what I am right now. Oh, woe is me indeed, should I continue in such cautiousness! Comfort is no by-product of righteousness: comfort is complacency; comfort is sin. To run with abandon to that free gift of grace--that is my desire, and praise be to Him that, there in His arms, in place of mere comfort we are given munificent, permanent rest: Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest! (Heb. 4:11)

How many times can I quote a single passage on this blog? Apparently not enough... I am thrown once again to 2 Peter 1:3-8:

His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires. [Praise God that beyond the exhaustion I feel, I am given everything I need for life and godliness!]
For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins.
Therefore, my brothers, be all the more eager to make your calling and election sure. For if you do these things, you will never fall, and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Happy Election season!

A Year of Praise

It's pretty much official: I am the parent of a toddler. Well, technically, she won't be a toddler until Sunday, but the amount of protesting that is coming from her crib at the moment says otherwise.

In spite of that, I must say that I am completely enamored. She babbles, reaches for things, crinkles up her nose--all the normal things a one-year-old is expected to do, but just because she's my daughter, it's different somehow. And of course I expect it to be.

My constant prayer is that she be a vessel to bring God glory--that is, to be such a person that others can look at her and praise God. How is that done? It's impossible to say. But the Spirit in his wordlessness speaks louder than all the words that man could muster. So, as a parent, I naturally feel that soul connection when I look at my daughter, and in that spirit-tug that ties us, I offer up praise to my Father.

But I am most pleased during those times when we are out doing the mundane, like grocery shopping; it is then that I see all the smiles she can bring to people who are not related to her, to those who've never before seen or experienced her beauty. Gruff-looking, bearded men turn to sugar at her babbling. Tired-looking cashiers perk up when she waves hello. Little old ladies see her smile and remember their own babies, now grown--I see it in their eyes.

And when I see these strangers react to my little girl, I pray that she will always have these supernatural abilities--for that is what they are. In her innocence, she points people to the Most Innocent of all. In her babyhood, she is doing what we are all meant to do: She is bringing praise to the Father, being who she was created to be.

This Saturday we are throwing a small shindig to celebrate that. Birthday celebrations in America tend to be too much about the "gimme-gimme" and the "look at me, I'm special!", and I don't want my daughter to fall into that mindset. It's not about her. But...with every year that passes, if she can maintain the felicitousness she now embodies, that will indeed be something to celebrate. Praise to our Father for the beauty of his creation!

Lunar Thoughts

God saw fit to give our planet just one moon; as such, it is often used as a visual symbol for loneliness. (Just think of any sappy love movie, and there's probably a scene in which one character is pining away, staring at a bright moon, or at least sighing over one in the background.) What mercy is shown to us through this gift! What if there were two moons in our sky--or more? (Consider, for example, that the planet Jupiter may have over 60 moons.)


Solomon writes in Ecclesiastes 3:11, "[God] has also set eternity in the hearts of men." We are designed to desire things greater than ourselves. What is bigger and more outside ourselves than an entire, other globe outside of our vast planet's atmosphere? Moreover, there is no more constant reminder of our need for companionship in this life. With what else could a lonely individual sympathize so greatly, should our man in the moon have his mate?


No, God in his great mercy has chosen for Earth a single moon to show us he understands what it means to be alone. He created loneliness; and in some sense of the word, he himself is in fact lonely. It is true that "[men] cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end" (the rest of Ecc. 3:11)--Indeed, we cannot fathom that the omnipotent Creator God would want our companionship, that he would seek us, that he would woo us; but nonetheless, that is exactly what he does: He is the lover of our souls! And his engagement ring to me shines bigger and brighter than all the artificial competition lining these streets. Our moon is a reminder that I am insignificant but known, unworthy but loved, and betrothed to a fully faithful Lord... Our wedding day cannot come soon enough!

Washing

While it would not be too far from the truth to say that I enjoy washing the dishes on occasion, what I mostly want to say here is that, occasionally, I enjoy washing the dishes. Through this task, I think of how gracious God is to provide this simple metaphor of soap and water.

Each person has his or her own method of dishwashing. Mine goes something like this:

1. Remove all the gunk with hot water (soak if necessary)--a sponge, scrubbrush, or fingers will do.
2. Load small items into a dishtub. Fill with hot, soapy water.
3. Use a rag to wash each item. Rinse under hot water.
4. Place in rack to dry. Unload rack when fully dry.

This is such a simple chore that it affords me the ability to turn off the concentration reserved for, say, feeding the baby in dress clothes, making a grocery list, or--these days--even showering. Indeed, doing the dishes gives me time to think, time to pray. This is my new, happy secret and is best done on a mild day, with the blinds open and sun shining in, and a soft breeze stirring the curtains in the family room, where the balcony door is pushed wide open.

And as I stand at the sink with soapy hands on this picture-perfect day, I recall from my childhood my mother doing the same. I often asked why she didn't put some music on while working like that--she certainly did the dishes often enough to have earned some form of entertainment. But she always worked in silence. Now, I shake my head and smile at this thought--that's definitely on the list of "Things You'll Understand When You're Older." Silence is never more golden than when you're a parent.

So it is in this warm, quiet, sudsy environment that I approach the throne of grace, remembering that Christ the King himself washed worse than greasy pots and pans--he humbly washed his disciples' feet, and, beyond the physical, he does himself quite an injustice by washing our souls, to boot. (Can your soap do that?) Grace is handed down to us in so many forms; how thankful I am that it washes over me in such mundane moments as these.

A Not-Very-Eastery Poem

The brain is a wonderous thing...especially during that time between waking and sleeping.

Upon Waking Easter Morning, 2008

It is so tired in here
That I am trying to rhyme "broccoli" and "spinach",
Relating each to presidential race '08:
Does McCain eat his broccoli?
And--in perfect reason--to musicals:
Moses supposes his toeses are roses,
But Moses supposes erroneously...

6:30
is too early
for anyone but the poet in me
apparently
the poet thrives on four hours of sleep

© H.D. Mar. 23, 2008

Christ (and Politics?) Alone

On this blog, I do my best to transcend trifling subjects. That is, I do not wish to simply put down events that have happened, but rather to show their significance in this wide world, to point people (myself, most of all) to a higher reason for them--for which reason must often be thrown out the window. So reluctantly, but necessarily, I must discuss the current buzz of the political world; necessarily so, because my heart and soul are hurting for the state of our nation and the state of the souls of men.

Lately, being home most every day, I have been listening to talk radio, which I do enjoy. It keeps me up to date on current events, which I feel I need to be following more closely than I've done in the past.

And on the radio (and elsewhere, of course), Barak Obama has been taking quite a hit because his pastor, Jeremiah Wright (it pains me to say "Reverend"), has been recorded vehemently spouting "anti-American," racist sentiments. Moreover, Obama replied to the angry masses with an historical speech on race, proceeding the next day to use the phrase "typical white person" in an interview, therefore taking yet another hit. So in summary, I've been hearing quite a bit of opinion from various Americans regarding this issue. Church-goers and others alike are astounded by the words of these men, and they should be, for the most part.

On the other end of the spectrum (sort of), I was sent an email containing a link to a YouTube video in which a black pastor in New York was preaching against Obama, basically calling him an agent of the devil. At one point, he even directly called Obama a "freak." So one black pastor sings Obama's praises in a bigotted way, and another black pastor condemns him in a bigotted way.

Now, I understand that sound bites can definitely take things out of context and, furthermore, perhaps I have not searched deeply enough, but...um, I'm having a little trouble finding people who are righteously outraged that these preachers are using the pulpit to bring forth anything other than Christ. I imagine that if Christ Himself could hold His nose long enough to walk into these churches, He would overturn the pulpits (one complete with a "Jesus is Lord" banner), for they certainly seem to be dens of robbers--robbing people of the truth that is Christ alone.

I am reminded "not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven..." Though in that same passage (Matthew 7) is the "Do not judge, or you too will be judged" verse, so do understand that I am not saying these men aren't actually Christians; it is obviously not my place to make that call. I simply want to know: What happened to pastors preaching Christ? Is the word of God so powerless as to need the help of man's viewpoint?

Christ is the supreme example of love (a love not of ourselves but of God, and love for others out of that love for God!), but I see no love in the words of these men. Jesus did not love certain groups of people, he loved all people, and that includes Hillary, Barak, McCain, Bush...every politician that ever made you appreciate or detest politics. They are all humans with souls, and slandering them will not save them. (Are you listening, right-wingers?) It will not save this nation either, as if we could slander the "bad" presidential candidates right out of office, then pat ourselves on the back for it.

God says, "When I shut up the heavens so that there is no rain, or command locusts to devour the land or send a plague among my people, if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." (2 Chronicles 7:13-14) The more I listen to the news, the more I feel that we are in a spiritual drought, that armies of demons are devouring the hearts of man, that a plague of un-common sense is killing us off by the thousands. And that impresses on me the very great importance of a humble heart in prayer.

1 Peter 4:7-8 and 17-18: "The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins...it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And, 'If it is hard for the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?'"

So get angry, America. So angry that you trade your "humble opinions" for humble hearts; so angry that you cry out for the One that can bring real change, change not of human policies but of the human condition from the inside out. Love as Christ would love. And let it begin in me.

Good Friday

On this Good Friday, we are compelled to ruminate on the death of our Lord. Not a pleasant subject on the one hand, but certainly a subject that sings all the pleasantries possible in this temporal life, should we believe on Him.

After all, "He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification. Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 4:25-5:1-8)

Oh, Lord, how great is Your love!


from "East Coker" by T.S. Eliot:

The wounded surgeon plies the steel
That questions the distempered part;
Beneath the bleeding hands we feel
The sharp compassion of the healer's art
Resolving the enigma of the fever chart.

Our only health is the disease
If we obey the dying nurse
Whose constant care is not to please
But to remind of our, and Adam's curse,
And that, to be restored, our sickness must grow worse.

The whole earth is our hospital
Endowed by the ruined millionaire,
Wherein, if we do well, we shall
Die of the absolute paternal care
That will not leave us, but prevents us everywhere.

The chill ascends from feet to knees,
The fever sings in mental wires.
If to be warmed, then I must freeze
And quake in frigid purgatorial fires
Of which the flame is roses, and the smoke is briars.

The dripping blood our only drink,
The bloody flesh our only food:
In spite of which we like to think
That we are sound, substantial flesh and blood--
Again, in spite of that, we call this Friday good.

Signs of Spring

This windows-open, sunshine-in, breezy kind of day; my little girl playing peekaboo from her Pack-n-Play; Caedmon's Call on iTunes; poetry before me; friends flooding my thoughts...

Suddenly, I'm overwhelmed by a deep sense of contentment mixed with humility. Why does God allow these moments for one such as me? Certainly not because of me--Nothing I have or do is anything I've obtained myself, nothing is worthy of boasting about; it is by His grace that I am given such reminders of His goodness. I will boast only in the Lord, that He chooses to shower me with His love. Praise be to Him on this intoxicating day!

Jeremiah 9:23-24:
Thus says the LORD: "Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the LORD."

Amen!

Just Be...

As Americans especially, we are cursed from the start with the need to understand our "identity." What am I supposed to be doing in this life? What is my role? Who am I?

If I may suggest, often there is rather too much emphasis on the "I" in that last question; when we ask "Who am I?", we are focusing on our individual identity, searching for the qualities that make us as individuals stand out from the rest of the crowded world. In asking "Who am I?", we are really asking, "What makes me unique?"

But is that really what we are to be searching for? On the contrary, let us emphasis the "am": "Who am I?" drives us to a great mystery, for it emphasizes the idea of "being"--a less familiar concept for Westerners--rather than that of "doing" or "having." To meditate on what it means simply "to be" is to concern ourselves with the spiritual, for it demands a dissociation of one's identity with one's job, or of one's identity with one's possessions. We cannot work our way into an identity. Nay, we cannot even think our way into it, for to think is an action as well. No, the only way to come to an understanding of identity is to be our way into it.

I am, of course, speaking from a Christian point of view, so let us start at the beginning: God.

God said to Moses, 'I AM WHO I AM.' And he said, 'Say this to the people of Israel, "I AM has sent me to you."' Exodus 3:14 ESV

"I AM" is God's self-given name and demonstrates his self-existence. That is no easy concept to grasp--but then again, that is God. Moreover, in John 8:58, Christ says to the Pharisees, "Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am." He knew this would be blasphemy to the ears of the Pharisees, and with the tiny word "I am", he invited a stoning. He later did it a second time in John 10:30 by saying, "I and the Father are one."

When we finish off the Trinity with the Holy Spirit, that's where things get exciting for us. The Spirit who dwells in us, sent by Jesus from the Father (John 14-15), reveals to us the heart and character of the Father. That is, if we know Christ, we have the Spirit and know God--God who was, is, and will always be "being" itself! He is the Beginning and the End because he has no beginning nor end. And it is because I rest in him that my identity of ten years ago, my identity of today, my identity of many years from now--none of them matter if I have dissolved my individual self into the perfect unity of the great I AM. He is unchanging, so though my personal circumstances change throughout my speck of a life, my identify remains the same:

I am a child of God.

The more I meditate on this simple thought, the more joy swells within me, the more praise I wish to offer, and therefore, the more heaven I glimpse--God enjoying man enjoying God. Truly, there is nothing greater than being in the presence of Being.

For God is not interested in what we do; He is interested in who we are as we do. He has given us freedoms galore; no matter our season of life or daily task, what is our heart attitude? Are we being spiritual creatures? That would be signified not by outward accomplishments but by the inward bearing of spiritual fruit, which we accomplish by increasing our knowledge of the Lord Jesus:

His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire. For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

These are Peter's words in 2 Peter 1:3-8. I've quoted them before but read them now afresh. If we truly desire Christ, then will we not also desire the complete obliteration of a separate, personal identity? Yet how does that reconcile with church life, with good deeds, with spiritual giftings? Glory be to the King of the absurd! 2 Peter 1:9-11:

For whoever lacks these qualities [faith, love, etc.] is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins. Therefore, brothers, be all the more diligent to make your calling and election sure, for if you practice these qualities you will never fall. For in this way there will be richly provided for you an entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

I don't feel as though I've said this at all like I should (the need for sleep is heavy now), but essentially, the more we desire Christ, the more we will be like him--our prominent gifts will be used, our lesser gifts developed; our actions will be pure, purposeful, fruitful. Regardless of my uniqueness, in the end I find that who I am is a pathetic creature saved by the grace of all-powerful God, and still--He must become greater; I must become less.

More Thoughts on Words (Or Just One, Really)

So after many months I've still been trying to wrap my mind around Christ as The Word, the singular and best expression of God to mankind. And as I send these puny thoughts out into cyberspace, I ponder the thousands of other blogs like mine, made by people just as average as me, just as desperate to communicate, just as hopeful to be known on a deeper, soul-bearing level. Man's desire to be known is a strong one, and I will say it again (shall I say it again?): God gave us words with which to try, and that is not a gift to be squandered.

So we send out our squiggles and lines, which are barely representations of the soul reality we are straining to see (and with the eyesight of a mole to boot). We put into forms that which has no form; we choose denotations and connotations but are never quite satisfied with how we say something because we know some random soul will misinterpret the whole thing, and the unity we desire will be squashed into frustration instead. (Indeed, the good gift of words can become a poison if we do not guard it.)

Good or bad, language links us, and it behooves us to think both horizontally and vertically. Some bloggers know their audience and write expressly for them; others, however, write for no real audience but themselves and the occasional, accidental reader. I like to think, though, that we of the latter category write also for God the Spirit--not God as an audience, however; no, He is more, perhaps, the muse, or the prompter who provides the lines we attempt to deliver on this makeshift stage. And, oh!, how I need Him, for I do make a rather poor thespian, constantly forgetting and asking for those lines, but made a better player by them in the end.

He's merciful that way.

But beyond this idea of audience, why do we write? God has endowed us all with a need to communicate. From the babble of infants to the poetry of the most erudite masters, language shapes our learning, and learning shapes our language. To what end (and from what beginning) does this spiral advance? The irony of it all is that, from before time, over the course of history and into the future, all the words that have ever been or ever will be spoken all point to--from man's perspective--one need: the need for a God who understands him even without those billions of words in billions of languages, spoken desperately whether he's known it or not. From God's perspective, however, they point to Himself, for the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. God did, after all, create this idea of words--something paradoxical enough that it actually works. He is our Author: the one Word. All we've ever needed, and all we'll ever need.

A Revision

Just a note to say I revised a small part of the poem "Words" (below). I switched

To think and keep thinking,
To write and keep writing,

with

To make these futile attempts,
To delight in them,

I think the consonance is much better now. ...not that anyone but me would care! But writing is a process, and capturing that process at least occasionally is important. I think remembering it helps writers remember to keep their patience (and their sanity) when in the trenches.
And I feel as though I am in the pre-trenches at the moment; I'm hoping these post-holiday thoughts will settle down on paper soon...